Wednesday, November 3, 2010

My Beating Heart

“Estoy aqui. Abierto a la vida. Abrazo el mundo con amor, y lo llevo a mi Corazon”

I am getting ready to go to Guatemala; yet, emotionally I am unable to focus on the grand adventure that God has allowed me to partake in. With the changing of weather, changing of seasons, changing of life plans and directions, I am a mess. I have been craving meat, sweets, and intimacy. I have been unmotivated and have lack of energy. This is what depression must feel like.

I must keep in mind that God has me where He wants me. That I must be patient, and wait on the Lord. I must guard the well springs of my heart too. I need to remind myself of what Pastor Mark said about depression: "We must seek what is true, light, pure, and holy." Depression and darkness cannot survive in the light.

My new mantra:
“I am here. Open to life. I embrace the world with love, and take it to my heart.”
Thank you God for blessing my life, and allowing me to give the world my heart; only through my hands acting as your tangible gift, am I able to do this. Prepare me for the journey that I am about to take. Come Daddy and wrap your loving arms around me to give my heart peace.

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