Thursday, October 28, 2010

Life lesson: Actions speak louder than words

Upon reflection of the entire event, my best friend Matt helped me realize that Zachary taught me a lesson about life that no one else could. When I met Zachary, I was a senior in High School. Two weeks after graduation, Zachary and I started to date. We decided that even though I was leaving for college in a few months that we should spend our summer together. This relationship lasted almost four years.  Upon entering into college I was a size 10: A healthy size for the women in my family. Within five years I had gained 40lbs and was miserable. My body was unhappy. Just this year, since January 1, 2010, I have lost 50lbs. This was my commitment to myself to regain control of my life. I get up four days a week and attend a 7am class at the FSU Leach Center.  Trust me, dropping pounds is not an easy task, but the old adage “diet and exercise” still holds true. I learned as much as I could about eating a raw whole foods diet. I read Angela Monarch’s website:  Within a few months I was dropping pounds.  I want to be the skinny hot girl. I want to be attractive, but Zachary proved to me that I am.

When younger I always faced opposition to my size and weight. I was never happy with the way my body looked. The lesson that Zach taught me, which is God’s way of blessing me with his unfailing and unconditional love, is that Zach loved me no matter what size I was. He did not care that I had put on a lot of weight; he wanted to be with me intimately regardless of what I looked like. Why did he sacrifice for me? His mom told me that I was the love of his life, but he loved my heart and my spirit more than being physical with me. I never believed this to be true, until he actually refused my new smaller and toned body. For years Zachary wanted to know my biggest turn on, and he finally found it. Not giving into my body, not allowing me to break my promise to God, proving his level of maturity in the situation, made me want him more than I ever had before.  Actions truly speak louder than words.

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